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Forgiveness Healing Through The Physical Body?

At  birth we are delivered into the sunlight with a physical vehicle, some would say temple, of a flesh, bone and fluid.  What purpose does it serve?  Why do we abuse it so? When will we fully understand the reasons for this journey through physical life on Earth?    tulip_123

Busting up a body part (acl avulsion of the right tibia) has allowed me to reflect on these questions.  Stopping my daily routine long enough to wonder with my imagination why I am here and what is my purpose.  The gift of my physical body has allowed me a vehicle to feel and allow  illusions to fall away.  The season of  Lent is a journey  that regularly brings me closer to God.  This year my body with it’s broken bone is showing me the way once more.  How fragile is the flesh and how consistent is the spirit,  the mind and the heart?  What I have discovered as I have been forced to stop and be still is that forgiveness is a wonderful way to wander through the levels of pain that stay stuck in our being, our bones, flesh and blood.

Forgiveness is the last sacrament Christ gave in his physical body before he “died”.   He forgave everyone everything. This is something I am beginning to understand.  The physical body holds pain and incurs suffering as the flesh and bone break apart.  Yet for me, my experience with physical pain is showing me something I did not understand before.  The process of forgiveness takes all the  pain away and replaces it with Love (Love Heals All Remember).  It led me to wonder if Christ actually felt any pain during his crucifixion.

Does the body hold pain because we are wanting of love and forgiveness of each others  pain?  Seems to me it does. Can the body let go of all pain when we are in a complete state of forgiveness and love as Christ was?  My experience with my recent injury leads me to believe the answer is YES.  I broke my leg.  It didn’t hurt too much.  Curious??  The swelling, the discomfort  was present yes, but  severe, throbbing pain NO!  When I took the pain medication as prescribed by doctors I felt more sick from nausea due to the medication than I did from the pain of the injury.  HMM? Curious some more??

The same happened after my surgery.  The medication, Percocet, demurral, morphine,  all made me feel so ill.  As soon as I stopped taking the meds I felt much better and noticed the pain in my knee was minimal and certainly very manageable.  This caused me more wonder, because I remembered that when I broke my wrist 16 years prior on the very same mountain (Cannon) the medication was necessary and vital to handle the pain and my sanity.  Back then I did not feel any nausea.

Therefore, I am very curious and wondering if my many years of personal process and emotional clearing  have changed the way I feel pain physically?  I know how to clear emotional pain and have been DOING it.  Now, I am realizing the truth I always suspected but did not fully understand via my experience.  Which is;  through regular and consistent pursuing of who I AM, and with the releasing , clarifying, understanding and acknowledgement of my own emotional, mental and spiritual pain,  my biochemistry has indeed changed enough that the degree to which I feel physical pain is lessened?  Alleluia! Miraculous!

During my latest recuperation the tone of forgiveness I am delivering to myself and other, has brought me deeper into my bones.  I have been releasing  what was held in guilt, resentment, jealously, fear and lack of love toward myself or another.  These feelings toward the ones who broke my heart with alcoholism and disappointment allowed me to begin another walk of forgiveness while my legs were still.    I wonder if Jesus Christ felt any pain at all.  Could his forgiveness have been so powerful he felt only forgiveness, love, and bliss as he was beaten and disparaged while he headed toward his father?   I found a validation of this idea through  A Course In Miracles which teaches this as it’s core.  With this understanding I began to forgive myself deeply and consciously.

Gradually over these Lenten weeks I have been releasing, feeling and resisting with consciousness all of the illusory perpetrators who levied against me unjustly incidents, accidents, abuse and neglect.  I forgave one by one and all in one from the crystal of my bones.  Even those who were without alcohol, but neglected to tell something of love or importance for my well being.  Any and all who ever broke my heart.  They did knot know I was broken hearted, as they were unconscious and in illusion within an illusory world.  And Neither did I.  All is released and forgiven…We are all one and of the same spirit and of the same LOVE.

During this Easter season, I am excited to experience my own resurrection and the Joy  that will be revealed…to be continued.

Every ACOA Can Mend Their PTSD

ACOA = Adult Child of an Alcoholic PTSD = Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

Once upon a time there was a little girl who was unfortunately influenced by the effects of having a parent who was subject to being under the influence of alcohol. This child and this parent were truly just regular folks who felt pain. Be it the pain of overwhelm, fear of death, loss, lack, feelings of inadequacy, and depression. The child was subject to many mini-traumas and sometimes large traumas. Children feel way more than we understand. The sense of fear that would be elicited in the girl’s body made her heart jump and her breath stop. The fear of saying or doing the wrong thing made her become very careful and reserved, for an accidental burst of joy or smart talk could affect the whole family when the bear woke and showed its ugly teeth. One could not jeopardize the entire group through bad words or behavior. Thus slowly and sometimes instantly, the shut down begins and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is born within another innocent heart.

Gradually numbing and disconnect occur in the heart of the girl who loved to be free and spontaneous was gone and buried deep within where no one could see her. She was hidden away. Her trust in her family was shifted to disappointment. Was it possible to trust anyone in this world? Doesn’t every parent betray, abandon and neglect? How does one figure all this out? I know… I’ll be really good in school where expectations are more predictable.

Sometimes her fear turned into rage. How can anyone for so long hold their precious feelings ever so tightly with no room for passion and hopefulness, creativity, empowerment and enthusiasm? All of these wonderful growth feelings every child deserves to engage with were limited and diminished by the alcoholic parent. The feelings that were allowed were despair, discouragement, insecurity, numbing, unworthiness and powerlessness. She had acquired those in abundance and lived with them every day until her ability to feel the others was nearly gone.

Now as and Adult Child of an Alcoholic (ACOA), she has the clear choice to not engage with the alcoholic or the behavior patterns. She slowly uncovers the joyful feelings and creates space to give them new light and air to breath and expand. The process can be challenging, but the outcome is always blissfully better. More time spent with appreciation, love, knowledge and freedom, is worth the dark journey to it. She found her way out of the tunnel of fear and into the tunnel of Love. The Good news is she didn’t do it alone. She found many allies who held a loving witness to the traumas while she recovered her lost heart.

It is important to find the support you need with fellow travelers who have endured the rigorous training and imprinting living in a family of alcoholics brings to us. Get yourself to an Al-Anon meeting that feels good to you. There you will find a fellowship of travelers. Try some psychotherapy to work out the details of the pain and events that caused the mini-traumas leading to the varying levels of PTSD which may affect you in adulthood. Energy healing can help you re-pattern your bio-energetic neuro-network that was imprinted with the alcoholic training. Reiki Energy Healing can also help you re-parent yourself to a new place of improved emotional response to the triggers of life.

Always remember to have compassion for yourself and the alcoholic who was most likely a little child with some scary bear in the house as well. Love and forgiveness heal all wounds. It just takes time and support to recover. If you would like to talk about this disease some more schedule a Free consult with me to see if Energy Healing is right for you. Call or Email me today. See the schedule for days and times. Blessings for your recovery.

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